Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Valentine...


There are very few love songs that mean much to me. Mostly because I see love as primarily something other people experience.

This song speaks to my heart. So on Valentine's Day this year I've decided to post the lyrics.

One of the things I love about Pink is how she writes about how it really feels to be a damaged girl reaching out for something sh's scared to want....





"Glitter In The Air"


Have you ever fed a lover with just your hands


Closed your eyes and trusted, just trusted


Have you ever thrown a fist full of glitter in the air


Have you ever looked fear in the face and said, "I just don't care"


It's only half past the point of no return


The tip of the iceberg


The sun before the burn


The thunder before the lightning


The breath before the phrase


Have you ever felt this way


Have you ever hated yourself for staring at the phone


You're whole life waiting on the ring to prove you're not alone


Have you ever been touched so gently you had to cry


Have you ever invited a stranger to come inside

It's only half past the point of oblivion


The hourglass on the table


The walk before the run


The breath before the kiss


And the fear before the flames


Have you ever felt this way


There you are, sitting in the garden

Clutching my coffee,


Calling me sugar


You called me sugar


Have you ever wished for an endless night


Lassoed the moon and the stars and pulled that rope tight


Have you ever held your breath and asked yourself will it ever get better than tonight


Tonight

Monday, February 06, 2012

Good Grief...





How long are we allowed to miss someone? Is there a time frame? Does moving on mean we let the sadness go?


I've lost many people in my life. Tent post people. The ones that hold you up and keep you steady. I'm not a depressed person, and I am enjoying my life. Yet there are moments when I miss these people so profoundly my heart clenches. 6 months, 7 years, 15 years. Time does not change how badly it hurts. I think this is normal. I refuse to believe that choosing to embrace heartache is bad for me.

Thursday, February 02, 2012

16 Years Later...

Who would have thought there could still be firsts? Just when I think It's impossible to shock or surprise me...

I'm going to sit calmly and reflect. I'm going to make peace with the fact that sometimes I am just a girl.

Monday, January 30, 2012

Trying Something New...

Funny how something so simple can both thrill and terrify me. I'm so used to being treated in a very specific way by men, it's a shock when I'm regarded any differently. With this man, another first.....

A friend with benefits. The true benefit being actual friendship!

I think I may not hate this developement. ;D



Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Ever After

Sometimes I'm surprised to find I still believe in happy endings. Perhaps not for me, but in general I do believe they exist. In a lot of ways believing in love is exactly like believing in God. I don't see it, but I feel it in the undercurrent of everything around me. Maybe if I can reach around my cynical intellect, I'll touch something substantial and true... I do know one thing for certain.... I will never settle for less than the real thing. I've seen too many people destroyed by illusions of "love".

Thursday, January 19, 2012




Happy Birthday to my HERO!





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Breathing Again....

I took some time away from here to blog elsewhere. Sometimes sharing here is like ice on an exposed nerve. I'm not very good at superficial emotion and I feel like if I can't share the real me I shouldn't share at all...

Brace yourself. I'm back now and running full throttle. So love me, hate me. For better or worse I'm here to stay.



GOD HELP US!

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Things I Carry with Me from Dolly Songs: Part One


"It's just one emotion after another. They will dress themselves as angels and thieves. They will make you believe you're in heaven, then they drag you through hell on your knees"


"Marching, marching, onward searching out the light of truth. I did not start the war, but it's a battle I can't lose"


"These northern nights are dreary, and my southern heart is weary. These smokey mountain memories keep me strong"


"Somehow my heart never grew up. No one ever burst my balloon. So here I am swirling in stardust slow dancing with the moon"


"I'll love you to sleep at night. Wake you with a kiss. Things that I can't do I swear you won't miss"


"Someday when I'm over you, and when I think I'm able to, I might try to be your friend again. But I don't want to see your face till then"


"When it's family, they're a mirror of the worst and best in you"



"I am like a crippled bird in hopes one day to fly again"


"When a flower grows wild it can always survive. Wild flowers don't care where they grow"