And here is the answer key for those of you who have been playing along.
This is 1.a most re2.markable puzzle. It was found by a gentleman in an airplane seat pocket, on a flight from Los Angeles to Honolu3.lu, keeping him occupied for hours. He enjoyed it so much, he passed it on to some friends. One friend from Illinois worked on this while fishing from his 4.john boat. Another friend studied it while playing his ban5.jo. Elaine Taylor, a columnist friend, was so intrigued by it she mentioned it in her weekly newspaper column. Another friend 6.judges the 7.job of solving this puzzle so involving, s8.he brews a cup of tea to help her nerv9.es. There will be some names that are really easy to spot. That's a f10.act. Some people, however, will soon find themselves in a 11.jam, especially since the book names are not necessarily capitalized. T12.ruthfully, f13.rom answers we get, we are forced to admi14.t it usually takes a minister or scholar to see some of the15.m at the worst. Research has shown that something in our 16.genes is responsible for the difficulty we have in seeing the books in this paragraph. During a recent fund raising event, which featured this puzzle, the Alpha Delta 17.Phi lemonade booth set a new sales record. The local paper, the 18.Chronicle, surveyed over 200 patrons who reported that his puzzle was one of the most difficult they had ever seen. As 19.Daniel Huma20.na humbly puts it, "The books are all right here in plain view hidden from sight." T21.hose able to find all of them will hear great 22.lamentations from those who have to be shown. One 23.revelation that may help is that books like 24.Timothy and 25.Samuel may occur without their 26.numbers. also, keep in mind, that punctuation and spaces in the middle are nor27.mal. A chipper attitude will help you com28.pete really well against those who claim to know the answers. Remember, there is no need for a mad 29.exodus, there really are 30 books of the Bible lur30.king somewhere in this paragraph waiting to be found.
Monday, November 21, 2005
Friday, November 18, 2005
Puzzling...Part 1
Here is a puzzle that was sent to me a while ago. I found it to be fun and I couldn't put it down until I found every last book. I'm a nerd like that.
There are thirty books of the Bible in this paragraph. Can you find them?
This is a most remarkable puzzle. It was found by a gentleman in an airplane seat pocket, on a flight from Los Angeles to Honolulu, keeping him occupied for hours. He enjoyed it so much, he passed it on to some friends. One friend from Illinois worked on this while fishing from his john boat. Another friend studied it while playing his banjo. Elaine Taylor, a columnist friend, was so intrigued by it she mentioned it in her weekly newspaper column. Another friend judges the job of solving this puzzle so involving, she brews a cup of tea to help her nerves. There will be some names that are really easy to spot. That's a fact. Some people, however, will soon find themselves in a jam, especially since the book names are not necessarily capitalized. Truthfully, from answers we get, we are forced to admit it usually takes a minister or scholar to see some of them at the worst. Research has shown that something in our genes is responsible for the difficulty we have in seeing the books in this paragraph. During a recent fund raising event, which featured this puzzle, the Alpha Delta Phi lemonade booth set a new sales record. The local paper, the Chronicle, surveyed over 200 patrons who reported that his puzzle was one of the most difficult they had ever seen. As Daniel Humana humbly puts it, "The books are all right here in plain view hidden from sight." Those able to find all of them will hear great lamentations from those who have to be shown. One revelation that may help is that books like Timothy and Samuel may occur without their numbers. also, keep in mind, that punctuation and spaces in the middle are normal. A chipper attitude will help you compete really well against those who claim to know the answers. Remember, there is no need for a mad exodus, there really are 30 books of the Bible lurking somewhere in this paragraph waiting to be found.
Post comments and let me know how many you were able to spot!
There are thirty books of the Bible in this paragraph. Can you find them?
This is a most remarkable puzzle. It was found by a gentleman in an airplane seat pocket, on a flight from Los Angeles to Honolulu, keeping him occupied for hours. He enjoyed it so much, he passed it on to some friends. One friend from Illinois worked on this while fishing from his john boat. Another friend studied it while playing his banjo. Elaine Taylor, a columnist friend, was so intrigued by it she mentioned it in her weekly newspaper column. Another friend judges the job of solving this puzzle so involving, she brews a cup of tea to help her nerves. There will be some names that are really easy to spot. That's a fact. Some people, however, will soon find themselves in a jam, especially since the book names are not necessarily capitalized. Truthfully, from answers we get, we are forced to admit it usually takes a minister or scholar to see some of them at the worst. Research has shown that something in our genes is responsible for the difficulty we have in seeing the books in this paragraph. During a recent fund raising event, which featured this puzzle, the Alpha Delta Phi lemonade booth set a new sales record. The local paper, the Chronicle, surveyed over 200 patrons who reported that his puzzle was one of the most difficult they had ever seen. As Daniel Humana humbly puts it, "The books are all right here in plain view hidden from sight." Those able to find all of them will hear great lamentations from those who have to be shown. One revelation that may help is that books like Timothy and Samuel may occur without their numbers. also, keep in mind, that punctuation and spaces in the middle are normal. A chipper attitude will help you compete really well against those who claim to know the answers. Remember, there is no need for a mad exodus, there really are 30 books of the Bible lurking somewhere in this paragraph waiting to be found.
Post comments and let me know how many you were able to spot!
Thursday, November 17, 2005
Joy, Joy, Joy, Overflowing!
Last night I experienced an early Christmas miracle. When I got home, everything was tidy and fresh. My assistant had cleaned my house earlier that day. She was sweet enough to leave me a note explaining the things she had done, and the trial of scrubbing glue off my new kitchen floor...
And then the miracle.
Teri had decided that my passion for coffee could not wait until Christmas as my Father had suggested (he had it on good authority that Santa was bringing me a new coffee maker). There on the counter... Gleaming white like a gift straight from heaven, was my brand new coffee maker! My joy was similar to Ralphy in A Christmas Story. Red Ryder... Eat your heart out!
Thank you Teri for your kindness, and generosity. There will be a piping hot mug of "Michigan Cherry" with your name on it Sunday morning!
I hope everyone is having a lovely week. Mine is definitely picking up!
Mandy
And then the miracle.
Teri had decided that my passion for coffee could not wait until Christmas as my Father had suggested (he had it on good authority that Santa was bringing me a new coffee maker). There on the counter... Gleaming white like a gift straight from heaven, was my brand new coffee maker! My joy was similar to Ralphy in A Christmas Story. Red Ryder... Eat your heart out!
Thank you Teri for your kindness, and generosity. There will be a piping hot mug of "Michigan Cherry" with your name on it Sunday morning!
I hope everyone is having a lovely week. Mine is definitely picking up!
Mandy
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
An Update on MandyLand
Once again I'm breathing easy.
I am really enjoying getting to know both of my new assistants. What a fun bunch of ladies I have working with me. I know it's early, and things can defiantly sour with time, but I just feel like God has brought me to this place for a reason. All the junk I've struggled in the last month has served to put me in a better place than I could have hoped for. Jessy (one of my new hires) has offered to take me to a fitness center every other Saturday, so that I can stretch and swim, and exercise. This is HUGE for my overall health! Please be praying that I can find the necessary $150.00 a month to pay for the two of us to go. God will provide. Another blessing is that Teri (my other assistant) is willing to not only take me to Willow Creek McHenry County on Sunday's, but also attend services with me! This is all just such a vast improvement. I feel like I have options and choices again. Thank you again to everyone who prayed for these good things. Where would I be without you?
God Bless,
Mandy
P.S If you need to put a smile on your face I would recommend checking out Katie's blog. Forty Nerdy is just another Mayaism that lifts my spirits. Use it in a sentence this week.=)
I am really enjoying getting to know both of my new assistants. What a fun bunch of ladies I have working with me. I know it's early, and things can defiantly sour with time, but I just feel like God has brought me to this place for a reason. All the junk I've struggled in the last month has served to put me in a better place than I could have hoped for. Jessy (one of my new hires) has offered to take me to a fitness center every other Saturday, so that I can stretch and swim, and exercise. This is HUGE for my overall health! Please be praying that I can find the necessary $150.00 a month to pay for the two of us to go. God will provide. Another blessing is that Teri (my other assistant) is willing to not only take me to Willow Creek McHenry County on Sunday's, but also attend services with me! This is all just such a vast improvement. I feel like I have options and choices again. Thank you again to everyone who prayed for these good things. Where would I be without you?
God Bless,
Mandy
P.S If you need to put a smile on your face I would recommend checking out Katie's blog. Forty Nerdy is just another Mayaism that lifts my spirits. Use it in a sentence this week.=)
Monday, November 14, 2005
Breaking Up...
I love coffee. I love everything about coffee. The sweet aroma. The bold flavors. Coffee brings me great joy. So, you can imagine my horror upon discovering that my coffee pot was broken Sunday. My Mr. Coffee had failed me! After three years of devoted service, our relationship has ended. I'll miss you dear friend. Oh the times we've shared...
Sunday, November 13, 2005
THANK YOU!
Today I need to thank Heidi, Rob, and Brandon for all of their hard work yesterday. Thanks to these three angels, my flooring project is complete! My Kitchen and bathroom now have wonderful new tile. You are the best crew a girl could ask for and I can't thank you enough!
Thank you also to Phil for buying us pizza and feeding these hard workers.
Speaking as someone who needs help with well, EVERYTHING... I am a truly blessed girl. The fact that there are people willing to step in and do the things I can't simply blows my mind! It's easy to think in this day and age that kindness is missing. That hope is hiding. That selflessness is a foreign concept... My life is daily proof that these things are present! I wish everyone could experience this once in there lives. This truth that God is faithful to provide just what you need. Not only did He provide for my little condo, He also created a sense of fellowship. Yes, I'm a blessed girl indeed...
Thank you also to Phil for buying us pizza and feeding these hard workers.
Speaking as someone who needs help with well, EVERYTHING... I am a truly blessed girl. The fact that there are people willing to step in and do the things I can't simply blows my mind! It's easy to think in this day and age that kindness is missing. That hope is hiding. That selflessness is a foreign concept... My life is daily proof that these things are present! I wish everyone could experience this once in there lives. This truth that God is faithful to provide just what you need. Not only did He provide for my little condo, He also created a sense of fellowship. Yes, I'm a blessed girl indeed...
Monday, November 07, 2005
Chicken Little
Disney has done it again!
I saw Chicken Little on Saturday night, and let me just say...WOW! The movie was in 3D. The animation was outstanding. Disney has served up a fresh dose of magic. I think my mother would have adored this one. The colors and the vibrance blow your mind. But it's the sweet story being told that would have really touched her. If you get the chance, GO SEE IT!
Thursday, November 03, 2005
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
20 Lesser Known Facts...
1.) I was born exactly two months early. I was due to arrive on June 23. I showed up on April 23. This actually allowed my Mother to have all her kids in her twenties (her birthday was June 20).
2.) My favorite songs are "The Way You Look Tonight", "Slow Dancing With The Moon", and "Oh Holy Night".
3.) I still have the blanket Aunt Barb made when I was born.
4.) My favorite colors are pink, red, and orange.
5.) My earliest memories are from the age of 2.
6.) I am the third of three siblings, and the seventh of eight siblings depending on how well you know my family.
7.) I have four very close friendships with people I have never met in person.
8.) I once sang " Coat Of Many Colors" with Dolly Parton.
9.) I've had the same best friend since second grade.
10.) I was in psychotherapy at 18 for post traumatic stress disorder and suicidal tendencies.
11.) I've lost 136 lbs since June of 2003.
12.) My favorite places on earth are Disney World and the Smoky Mountains.
13.) I was tested as a genius at age 9.
14.) Cheaters and bullies give me the creeps.
15.) Some of the best discussions of my life have happened in the restroom.
16.) I'm afraid of the grates in city sidewalks.
17.) I like to sing when I'm on boats.
18.) The song that plays most in my head is "I Love You Lord".
19.) I prefer spring over fall, and fall over summer (I wish winter would go away entirely).
20.) My love language is words of affirmation.
In the spirit of these lists, I tag Heidi, Kim B, Kim A, Steph, and Becca.
2.) My favorite songs are "The Way You Look Tonight", "Slow Dancing With The Moon", and "Oh Holy Night".
3.) I still have the blanket Aunt Barb made when I was born.
4.) My favorite colors are pink, red, and orange.
5.) My earliest memories are from the age of 2.
6.) I am the third of three siblings, and the seventh of eight siblings depending on how well you know my family.
7.) I have four very close friendships with people I have never met in person.
8.) I once sang " Coat Of Many Colors" with Dolly Parton.
9.) I've had the same best friend since second grade.
10.) I was in psychotherapy at 18 for post traumatic stress disorder and suicidal tendencies.
11.) I've lost 136 lbs since June of 2003.
12.) My favorite places on earth are Disney World and the Smoky Mountains.
13.) I was tested as a genius at age 9.
14.) Cheaters and bullies give me the creeps.
15.) Some of the best discussions of my life have happened in the restroom.
16.) I'm afraid of the grates in city sidewalks.
17.) I like to sing when I'm on boats.
18.) The song that plays most in my head is "I Love You Lord".
19.) I prefer spring over fall, and fall over summer (I wish winter would go away entirely).
20.) My love language is words of affirmation.
In the spirit of these lists, I tag Heidi, Kim B, Kim A, Steph, and Becca.
Tuesday, November 01, 2005
Happy 30th Birthday Heidi!
My Dear Sister,
This year is going to be your year. I can feel it. I'm praying that every good thing comes your way this year. I think you're the best person God ever put on this earth (in the last 2,000 years or so) and I'm just blessed He put you in my life. I can't wait to see what your future holds. Thanks for being my best friend.
Love you always,
Manny
This year is going to be your year. I can feel it. I'm praying that every good thing comes your way this year. I think you're the best person God ever put on this earth (in the last 2,000 years or so) and I'm just blessed He put you in my life. I can't wait to see what your future holds. Thanks for being my best friend.
Love you always,
Manny
Monday, October 31, 2005
The Party....
My Big Sister is turning 30 tomorrow. To celebrate this occasion, we threw her a fantastic costume party. Heidi looked beautiful as the Queen of Hearts. Everyone really got into the spirit of the evening. I hope to post more pictures soon... For now, here's a peek into the funnest party I've been to all year!
What a Night!
The Dolly concert was even better than I expected! We had so much fun Friday. Dinner with Uncle Mike and Aunt Joey was a BLAST! Here are just a few pics from our awesome Dolly night...
Friday, October 28, 2005
Hello Dolly!
This is going to be a GREAT Friday... Tonight after work, Becca and I are having dinner with Uncle Mike and Aunt Joey downtown. We are headed to Cereality. It's this fun new restuaraunt that serves nothing but cereal! Pretty much any cereal, and topping you can imagine is available at this place. It should be excellent! Aunt Joey and I both said that this seems like our kind of dinner...
After dinner, Becca and I are headed to The Chicago Theatre to see Dolly Parton. I'm so thrilled, I could spit! It's been a few years since I've seen her perform live and I'm just bursting with excitement. For those of you who know me, you know my long standing love of all things Dolly. She is for me, what Eminem is for Drew. She's a passion, and a safe place. Her music is where I go to heal. For years now she has comforted me. I even got to meet her when I was 15. I can close my eyes now and still feel her hug. I can't wait! God is just blessing my socks off this week! It feels so good to have my little ducks in a row again. There is such joy in having things to look forward to! Thank you again to all my prayer warriors. I can't express to you all how greatful I am to have people looking out for me. If I can return the favor one day I will. For now, just know I love you and that I feel blessed by your presence in my life.
Wednesday, October 26, 2005
Timing...
I have been home since Friday. During this week of stress, and trial, I've caught myself an upper respiratory infection. This actually may be more of a blessing than anything else. I've been home and had time to interview people. I've rested. I've napped most of my time away with Diva on my chest. This infection forced me to slow down and to trust God's provision. Funny how He gets your full attention when you're unable to breathe!
So, it's Wednesday now and I think I've found the right people to take care of me. I'm feeling hopeful that next week will go smoothly. Just when I think the rug has been pulled out from under me God always steps in. I'm so blessed...
So, it's Wednesday now and I think I've found the right people to take care of me. I'm feeling hopeful that next week will go smoothly. Just when I think the rug has been pulled out from under me God always steps in. I'm so blessed...
Thursday, October 20, 2005
Things That I'm Grateful For...
1. The tremendous amount of prayer going up for my crazy little life this week.
2. The friends and family who jump in to offer me security.
3. The network of people working around me to find the perfect assistant.
4. The cousin in berwyn who offers her time and support even when she barely has enough for herself.
5. The puppy groomer/CNA who may want to work with me.
6. The cousin in Colorado who is traveling here next week just to celebrate Heidi.
7. Dad, Heidi, Marie, Steph, Katie, Becca, Rob, Diane, Sylvia, Debbi and Kim who all offered physical help where physical help was needed.
8. Sugar free cinnamon Rolls from Pillsbury.
9. DIVA.
10. Chocolate chip cookie dough in ice cream cones.
11. The woman in Utah who offered me first dibs on a puppy this week.
12. Sugar free TWIZZLERS
13. Dolly Parton at the Chicago Theatre next week.
14. Dinner at Cereality with one of my favorite people.
15. The cute guy that repairs wheelchairs.
16. Heidi's birthday celebration.
17. Size 12 jeans.
18. Season 1 of Fraggle Rock.
19. The song "Blessed Be Your Name".
20. Laurie Notaro.
If you read this, you know how difficult things have been lately. Please comment today. What are YOU grateful for? I could sure use the boost of good will.
Wednesday, October 19, 2005
And The Icing On My Cupcake...
Moogi called. She cleaned my house and left my keys. Today will be her last day... Two days was not very good, but it was better than none. I don't know which end is up anymore.
And It Just Gets Better and BETTER!
So, I've entered the seventh circle of hell. Moogi is not staying until November 1st. Her daughter's condition has worsened and she's leaving Saturday. For those of you following this saga, that leaves me TWO DAYS to find an honest, hardworking, trustworthy person. No pressure right? Lets not forget also that I currently have NO ONE to help me on Saturday morning... I've not felt this unprotected since the year after my Mom died. I feel like I'm in the way. The devil whispers that things would be better without me. He tells me that people would be better off without the burden that is me. This scares the shit out of me! I'm fighting hard right now to tell Satan to kiss my ass. I am struggling to hold on to my value, and my contribution.
I chant it over and over in my head, but the urge to give up is really strong right now. Please pray for me. It's scary to even type these things, but they are honest and today that's the best I can do.
I am necessary
I am worthy
I will be provided for
I chant it over and over in my head, but the urge to give up is really strong right now. Please pray for me. It's scary to even type these things, but they are honest and today that's the best I can do.
Tuesday, October 18, 2005
The Butterfly Over My Heart...
I know there is some version of this now floating around in cyberspace, but I don't actually care. The first time someone told me this, was 8 years ago... My Mother had just died and my world was folding in on itself.
My friend said, "Mandy, when I think of you I think of a butterfly working it's way out of the cocoon. The process is long and painful for the butterfly. But did you know that if you help a butterfly out of it's cocoon it won't have built up the strength to fly? I'm watching you struggle so hard right now, and I wish I could just scoop you up out of this mess. But I know God is using this time to make you strong. I can't wait to see what you do with your wings!"
Those words, and that image have so impacted me that I carry that image with me to this day. I have a tiny blue butterfly tattooed over my heart to remind me. I may not like the trials. I may hurt like hell. But, God is going to use this to strengthen me.
My friend said, "Mandy, when I think of you I think of a butterfly working it's way out of the cocoon. The process is long and painful for the butterfly. But did you know that if you help a butterfly out of it's cocoon it won't have built up the strength to fly? I'm watching you struggle so hard right now, and I wish I could just scoop you up out of this mess. But I know God is using this time to make you strong. I can't wait to see what you do with your wings!"
Those words, and that image have so impacted me that I carry that image with me to this day. I have a tiny blue butterfly tattooed over my heart to remind me. I may not like the trials. I may hurt like hell. But, God is going to use this to strengthen me.
Monday, October 17, 2005
Was it Worth it?
Laurie,
I know you can't answer this question. I know its like dumping my thoughts out into the void, but I have to ask it anyway. Was it worth it? I know heaven is great and all, but are you really ok with missing out on EVERYTHING? Are your eyes clear now? Can you see past your self these days? I know that you were consumed with LAURIE back in March. What about now? Can you see how you've wounded us all? The people who loved you are forever damaged thanks to your momentary blindness. Yes, we'll survive. People somehow live through these things. We'll move on and think back on you fondly. We'll remember you for who you were in this life. In fact as with most death, we'll probably glorify your memory past what you actually were. I choose to remember the real you. A beautiful, prideful, wonderful, vibrant, selfish, caring, generous, broken, intelligent, and highly stupid person whom I loved whole heartedly. A real flesh and blood woman who I admired and respected. A person so tangled in her own reality, that she couldn't see her way out. A lovely girl who cut her life short for some cruelly unexplained reason. That is who you are in my eyes. Some days I wish I could punch you. Other days I just really want to hug you. I miss your support. I miss your fire. I hate what you've done to the strongest family I know. The worst of all this, is that you can't take it back. I sit and monologue when I's rather have dialogue. You made a choice that leaves me speaking to a void. I can talk and talk. I can scream and yell. It makes not one bit of difference. It's still just me, without you.
Your bewildered cousin,
Mandy
I know you can't answer this question. I know its like dumping my thoughts out into the void, but I have to ask it anyway. Was it worth it? I know heaven is great and all, but are you really ok with missing out on EVERYTHING? Are your eyes clear now? Can you see past your self these days? I know that you were consumed with LAURIE back in March. What about now? Can you see how you've wounded us all? The people who loved you are forever damaged thanks to your momentary blindness. Yes, we'll survive. People somehow live through these things. We'll move on and think back on you fondly. We'll remember you for who you were in this life. In fact as with most death, we'll probably glorify your memory past what you actually were. I choose to remember the real you. A beautiful, prideful, wonderful, vibrant, selfish, caring, generous, broken, intelligent, and highly stupid person whom I loved whole heartedly. A real flesh and blood woman who I admired and respected. A person so tangled in her own reality, that she couldn't see her way out. A lovely girl who cut her life short for some cruelly unexplained reason. That is who you are in my eyes. Some days I wish I could punch you. Other days I just really want to hug you. I miss your support. I miss your fire. I hate what you've done to the strongest family I know. The worst of all this, is that you can't take it back. I sit and monologue when I's rather have dialogue. You made a choice that leaves me speaking to a void. I can talk and talk. I can scream and yell. It makes not one bit of difference. It's still just me, without you.
Your bewildered cousin,
Mandy
Friday, October 14, 2005
Credit, Where Credit Is Due...
I need to raise up a handful of people today. For those of you who are praying for me and encouraging me, I can't thank you enough. There is no greater power than the God of the universe. The fact that you talk to HIM about me, is truly awesome! However, during this time of very real panic, and trial, there have been those of you who have given me the most needed of gifts. Your time, your hands, and your care mean more to me than you may ever know.
Heidi- Thank you for offering the security of your care while I'm in transition. You know my routine so well, it's the one time I feel no strain. Also, your empathy in your last blog BLOWS ME AWAY!
Steph- Thank you for your care this coming weekend. You've given me a calm moment in my storm. Diva can't wait to meet you!=)
Kim B.- Thank you for helping me last weekend. I love spending time with you and knowing that I'm safe.
Marie- Thank you for being willing to "jump in" as needed. It helps me breathe easier knowing you're there.
Dad- Thanks for always being a phone call away. You're the best UPS man EVER!
Becca- Thank you for your daily support. I've never met someone so eager to help before. I'm convinced God put you on the 4:45 for a reason!
Moogi- Thank you so much for giving me notice. The fact that you care enough to never leave me stranded speaks highly of your character. You will always have a place in MandyLand, and in my heart.
Has there ever been such a blessed girl!?!?
Well, that being said, I feel much better. I am really looking forward to this weekend. My hope is that I can interview a few people and get a feel for who's out there. If anyone knows a trustworthy person who is needing a job, please send them my way.
Mandy
Heidi- Thank you for offering the security of your care while I'm in transition. You know my routine so well, it's the one time I feel no strain. Also, your empathy in your last blog BLOWS ME AWAY!
Steph- Thank you for your care this coming weekend. You've given me a calm moment in my storm. Diva can't wait to meet you!=)
Kim B.- Thank you for helping me last weekend. I love spending time with you and knowing that I'm safe.
Marie- Thank you for being willing to "jump in" as needed. It helps me breathe easier knowing you're there.
Dad- Thanks for always being a phone call away. You're the best UPS man EVER!
Becca- Thank you for your daily support. I've never met someone so eager to help before. I'm convinced God put you on the 4:45 for a reason!
Moogi- Thank you so much for giving me notice. The fact that you care enough to never leave me stranded speaks highly of your character. You will always have a place in MandyLand, and in my heart.
Has there ever been such a blessed girl!?!?
Well, that being said, I feel much better. I am really looking forward to this weekend. My hope is that I can interview a few people and get a feel for who's out there. If anyone knows a trustworthy person who is needing a job, please send them my way.
Mandy
Thursday, October 13, 2005
21....
Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday dear Kristin
Happy Birthday to YOU!
Kristin,
I hope 21 rocks. I hope you enjoy your new freedom. I love you BUNCHES, and I'm so greatful God put you in my family. I said it to Katie, and I'll say it to you... If life is a trial by fire, you are coming up GOLDEN my beautiful cousin.
Love,
Mandy
It's ALIVE!!!!
After much stress and craziness, the wheelchair is up and running. Praise God for getting me safely home! I went to church last night, and I'm glad I was there. Aunt Barb gave me a hug and a light up tinkerbell pen! She always has just what I need. =) My heart gets so heavy worrying about having my needs met. A friend said that everyone has those worries, but it's not really the same. Everyone worries about having enough food or shelter or provisions from time to time. Only a small portion of the world knows what its like to not know how they're getting up in the morning, or how they will get to the bathroom next. These things can crush me sometimes. I know God will provide my next caregiver, I'm just so tired of the high rotation. I would love it if the next person I hire could commit to 6 months minimum. I also think that when someone quits without warning they should owe me $50.00. That way at least I can afford my newspaper add for a week!
Today is bound to be better. My life feels less hopeless today... On to bigger and better things I suppose.
Peace & Blessings to all my prayer warriors.
Mandy
Philippians 4:19 My God will supply all your needs...
Today is bound to be better. My life feels less hopeless today... On to bigger and better things I suppose.
Peace & Blessings to all my prayer warriors.
Mandy
Philippians 4:19 My God will supply all your needs...
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
Oh Bridget Jones, How I Relate!
"It is a truth universally acknowledged that as soon as one part of your life starts looking up, another part falls spectacularly to pieces." -Bridget Jones
I should be blaming myself of course. I'm the one who got comfortable. I let my guard down. I began to think my life was clicking together rather smoothly. How stupid am I? I should know better by now.
Two weeks ago my weekend assistant of three years quit with absolutely no warning. I would expect this type of behavior from many people, but coming from a friend I went to high school with, it was a slap in my face. But, whatever... I could survive that. Its only my weekend care. I can manage. WRONG! Last night, my evening support informed me that she and her family are moving back to Mongolia on November 1st! Yes, that's right folks. I'm now in the market for both evening and weekend help. This BLOWS!
It's stressful enough adjusting to one new person, but two is more than I can handle. I hate needing people some days. I can't stand having to worry about how I'm going to get home, eat, shower, and shop from day to day. I wish my life didn't always have to rely on others to function properly. Don't get me wrong, for the most part Princesshood is a gift. I meet new people. I never have to clean, or cook, or do laundry... It's a rather pampered life. However, on days like this one, I'd trade almost everything in order to do it myself.
Pray for me. I'm so tired of this merry-go-round.
Additional Note at 10:42am: Did I mention my chair is dying? The charge is on empty and I have to wait for my HMO to approve repairs. Gee, I hope I'm not stuck in Chicago til whenever!
I should be blaming myself of course. I'm the one who got comfortable. I let my guard down. I began to think my life was clicking together rather smoothly. How stupid am I? I should know better by now.
Two weeks ago my weekend assistant of three years quit with absolutely no warning. I would expect this type of behavior from many people, but coming from a friend I went to high school with, it was a slap in my face. But, whatever... I could survive that. Its only my weekend care. I can manage. WRONG! Last night, my evening support informed me that she and her family are moving back to Mongolia on November 1st! Yes, that's right folks. I'm now in the market for both evening and weekend help. This BLOWS!
It's stressful enough adjusting to one new person, but two is more than I can handle. I hate needing people some days. I can't stand having to worry about how I'm going to get home, eat, shower, and shop from day to day. I wish my life didn't always have to rely on others to function properly. Don't get me wrong, for the most part Princesshood is a gift. I meet new people. I never have to clean, or cook, or do laundry... It's a rather pampered life. However, on days like this one, I'd trade almost everything in order to do it myself.
Pray for me. I'm so tired of this merry-go-round.
Additional Note at 10:42am: Did I mention my chair is dying? The charge is on empty and I have to wait for my HMO to approve repairs. Gee, I hope I'm not stuck in Chicago til whenever!
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
GREAT WEEKEND!
What an awesome weekend... I kicked it off Friday with dinner and singing. Marie and Becca came over after work to hang out and eat dinner. Thanks to Becca, I now have some fresh pictures of Diva. Saturday, my best friend Kim came to mandy land to meet my puppy and catch up. I had a blast! We watched Six Feet Under, picked pumpkins with Heidi, and had a visit with Aunt Barb. Too fun! Sunday, I relaxed at home with my Diva (no potty mistakes all day!), and then I watched Cinderella with Sandy. Anyone who knows me, knows how much I LOVE Disney! Yesterday, I was off from work for Columbus Day. Lil Jenny and I went to a movie... In Her Shoes was good, but a little heavier than I was looking for. I'm still trying to find someone to go see Corpse Bride, and W&G with me. On the whole, it was a great weekend. I saw some of my favorite people. I relaxed. It was perfect. My life spins so fast lately, It's nice to slow down for a moment and breathe.
Gee, Thanks Katie!
THE RULES: List five songs that you are currently loving. It doesn't matter what genre they are from, whether they have words, or even if they're any good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying right now. Post these instructions, the artists, and the songs in your blog. Then tag five other friends to see what they're listening to.
"Can't Keep Me Down"-PINK
"Slow Dancing With The Moon"-Dolly Parton
"Blessed Be Your Name"-Matt Redman
"Walkin' After Midnight"-Patsy Cline
"Meet Virginia"-Train
And now I tag...
Kim Brown
Becca Fradin
Heidi Miller
Steph Pelka
Greg Boncimino
YOU'RE IT!
"Can't Keep Me Down"-PINK
"Slow Dancing With The Moon"-Dolly Parton
"Blessed Be Your Name"-Matt Redman
"Walkin' After Midnight"-Patsy Cline
"Meet Virginia"-Train
And now I tag...
Kim Brown
Becca Fradin
Heidi Miller
Steph Pelka
Greg Boncimino
YOU'RE IT!
Friday, October 07, 2005
Finally! Pictures From My Adventure With The Michel Cuties!
My little cutie boy... Entertaining himself with tupperware!
Isaiah is pretty easy to please. He doesn't require fancy toys and tons of activity. Just give him some tupperware, and a couple slices of pizza... He's good to go!
Thursday, October 06, 2005
An Important Truth...
God Loves You
In the quiet, Love is reaching.
It's yours to hold,Be still and know that
Even when you're lost and lonely,
And hope is gone, you're not alone.
Far beyond the understanding,
There's a hand that leads, If you believe.
Through the darkness, see the light.
Remember God loves you.
The road ahead is long and winding.
With eyes of faith, you'll find the way, yeah.
And when the journey leaves you weary,
You can rest in the comfort of heaven's arms -Sweet loving arms.
And peace will follow.
Peace be with you always,
As you go. For now you know that...
Through the darkness, there's a light.
Remember God loves you.
When you open up your heart,
His love will meet you where you are.
He will always be a part of everything you do.
He is here to set you free,
And give you all the strength you need
To carry on, to carry on.
Through the darkness, see the light.
Remember God loves you. (remember, remember)Remember God loves you.
Today I post this song because I needed to be reminded. I pray that everyone who reads this today feels the truth of these words. God loves YOU! I can only speak for myself, but that kinda makes me want to love you more too.
Wednesday, October 05, 2005
Diva in MandyLand...
How can such a tiny little puppy create so much destruction? She looks so sweet and innocent! =)
It is official. Diva does NOT want me to go to work. She has made it quite clear that she prefers me home at all times. Apparently, she needs me to be her pillow throughout the day, and she is unable to function properly when I'm not present. The little darling has had two baths so far this week( it's only Wednesday by the way). When I get home at night, I find that she has trashed her crate entirely. In a staged protest, she has flung litter EVERYWHERE, destroyed two stuffed toys, and left me more "little presents" than such a small creature should be capable of. =) What a little stinker. It's a good thing I love her so much! For now we're taking it one day at a time.
It is official. Diva does NOT want me to go to work. She has made it quite clear that she prefers me home at all times. Apparently, she needs me to be her pillow throughout the day, and she is unable to function properly when I'm not present. The little darling has had two baths so far this week( it's only Wednesday by the way). When I get home at night, I find that she has trashed her crate entirely. In a staged protest, she has flung litter EVERYWHERE, destroyed two stuffed toys, and left me more "little presents" than such a small creature should be capable of. =) What a little stinker. It's a good thing I love her so much! For now we're taking it one day at a time.
KISS MY TIARA
How to rule the world as a smartmouth goddess
This is the title of a book I am reading. My friend Becca bought it for me as a gift. So far, this book has made me laugh out loud twice. While there are a few points that the author (Susan Jane Gilman) and I do not see eye to eye on, as a whole I can really relate. If you need a good giggle, and a solid dose of female empowering, I suggest picking this one up.
This is the title of a book I am reading. My friend Becca bought it for me as a gift. So far, this book has made me laugh out loud twice. While there are a few points that the author (Susan Jane Gilman) and I do not see eye to eye on, as a whole I can really relate. If you need a good giggle, and a solid dose of female empowering, I suggest picking this one up.
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
Artichokes, Coconuts, Sand Dollars, and Me...
Ever notice how some of the best stuff needs to be broken or ripped apart before you get to the good part? I think that's what my life is teaching me. I could hold it all together, and "make nice" with the world. I could put on a happy face and charm your socks off. Or, I can choose to be brave. I can break it all down. I can shatter everything and rebuild. I can get raw, and honest, and ugly... That's when it gets beautiful. I don't ever want to fake being me. It's dangerous and unhealthy. This may mean I make a few less friends. This may mean disappointing people with my actions. Too damn bad! I choose me. I choose wellness. I choose to be comfortable in my own skin. Wouldn't it be beautiful if we could all just get real with each other? A powerful force like that could change the world.
Monday, October 03, 2005
SoulFeast...
This year's women's retreat was a true gift from God. It was restful, and engaging. It also made me look at some things that I stuff down a lot. I took a class on solitude. What is God doing with my quiet moments? I have so few of them, that I think it's hard to say. For some reason, this retreat always surfaces the same four issues in my life.
1. What is God's purpose in making me?
2. My life occasionally burdens other people in order to run properly.
3. Where do I go from here/do I trust Him with the big stuff?
4. Who am I supposed to impact?
It seems like every year brings the same "junk" to the surface. There are times when I HATE needing people! Yet God made me to need physical help... It's an internal battle. I always see the bigger picture where my life is concerned. It's the smaller moments that can crush a girl. I rely on God to work with me and through me. I hear His calling on my life. Sometimes I'm just too chicken shit to make the leap that He demands. It's like when He told his disciples to leave everything and follow Him. I can honestly say I hear God calling me to something that drastic. The fear of the unknown holds me back. What fullness would God have for me if I just put myself in His hands? Margaret Becker said at the retreat that she had always wanted a husband, and 3-4 children. She knew the life she wanted and was struggling against God's timing. Today, she is a single woman, passionately involved in World Vision's child sponsorship program. She has thousands of children that God is entrusting to her! Her life is not as she planned. It's soooooooooo much better! What if the same is true of me? It's mind blowing. It's terrifying...
My favorite part of these retreats is the women I cross paths with. What a treat to share lives, and stories with other women on the journey. I met so many charming wonderful ladies this weekend. I need to highlight three.
To the new friend whom I've known on the surface for years,
Thank you for allowing me to be honest and open. I needed to let some things out, and you created a space for that.
Love, and Doodles
To the strong, independent, woman of God who is on her way to missions work,
Thank you for your kind words. Your support was so appreciated. God will do wonderful things with your life. Please don't ever lose your joy.
Stay in touch
To the Angel of blessing who let me cry in her shoulder,
Thank you for the safe place. Your compassion, and honesty blows me away. You have touched me many times with your talented voice. I'm glad God allowed us to share moments this weekend.
You are in my prayers
That pretty well wraps up my thoughts on this weekend. I pray that everyone can have a weekend like this at least once in their lifetime. I close this with an exercise in reflection.
1. What is God's purpose in making me?
2. My life occasionally burdens other people in order to run properly.
3. Where do I go from here/do I trust Him with the big stuff?
4. Who am I supposed to impact?
It seems like every year brings the same "junk" to the surface. There are times when I HATE needing people! Yet God made me to need physical help... It's an internal battle. I always see the bigger picture where my life is concerned. It's the smaller moments that can crush a girl. I rely on God to work with me and through me. I hear His calling on my life. Sometimes I'm just too chicken shit to make the leap that He demands. It's like when He told his disciples to leave everything and follow Him. I can honestly say I hear God calling me to something that drastic. The fear of the unknown holds me back. What fullness would God have for me if I just put myself in His hands? Margaret Becker said at the retreat that she had always wanted a husband, and 3-4 children. She knew the life she wanted and was struggling against God's timing. Today, she is a single woman, passionately involved in World Vision's child sponsorship program. She has thousands of children that God is entrusting to her! Her life is not as she planned. It's soooooooooo much better! What if the same is true of me? It's mind blowing. It's terrifying...
My favorite part of these retreats is the women I cross paths with. What a treat to share lives, and stories with other women on the journey. I met so many charming wonderful ladies this weekend. I need to highlight three.
To the new friend whom I've known on the surface for years,
Thank you for allowing me to be honest and open. I needed to let some things out, and you created a space for that.
Love, and Doodles
To the strong, independent, woman of God who is on her way to missions work,
Thank you for your kind words. Your support was so appreciated. God will do wonderful things with your life. Please don't ever lose your joy.
Stay in touch
To the Angel of blessing who let me cry in her shoulder,
Thank you for the safe place. Your compassion, and honesty blows me away. You have touched me many times with your talented voice. I'm glad God allowed us to share moments this weekend.
You are in my prayers
That pretty well wraps up my thoughts on this weekend. I pray that everyone can have a weekend like this at least once in their lifetime. I close this with an exercise in reflection.
Be still and know that I am God
Be still and know that I AM
Be still and know
Be still
Be
Sunday, October 02, 2005
Silence is Golden...
This little puppy just cracks my up! This is a picture from Becca. Diva is sleeping in my t shirt instead of her usual blanket. While I was on my retreat, she was busy napping, playing, and traumatizing the Fradin cats. She currently has no voice at all. She cried, and whined so much this weekend that she lost her voice this morning. =) This may be a small blessing. I might actually sleep tonight without the pitiful pleas for attention... It's sweet how she just wants to be close to me. It was so nice to come home to someone missing you! Mike and Becca were such great babysitters. I can't thank them enough for looking after my little girlie.
Friday, September 30, 2005
Crazy? I Was Crazy Once...
So, this week has been plain nuts! I was supposed to get my Diva Sunday, but the weather in SC was too hot to ship a live animal. Then I was supposed to get her Monday, but her vet had a cat come in with rabies, so he couldn't clear her for flying till Tuesday. Tuesday night, at 10:00pm Heidi, Marie, and I drove all the way to Milwaukee Airport to pick Diva up. BUT, wouldn't you know it? They sent me another girl's Chihuaua puppy by mistake! Diva had to spend the night in Detroit,Michigan...I was seriously beginning to doubt that she would ever get here at all. At 7:30pm Wednesday, Diva arrived at last! She was delivered directly to my apartment door. This happened after I calmly explained the rules of "Princesshood" to the manager of Delta air cargo.... I was not going to drive to Milwaukee again.
Diva is PERFECT! She's tiny, feisty, sweet, sassy, and all together lovable. She's already learning to use the litter box. I'm so proud! She also learned right away that she has to work with me if I'm going to pick her up. She actually climbs into my arms. Like me, she mostly likes to find the warmest place possible. She likes to nap in my arms. I'm so happy, I may BURST!
This morning I left for the SoulFeast retreat with Willow Creek. My friends Mike & Becca are babysitting till Sunday afternoon. It was painful leaving her this morning. Her little whimpers and moaning didn't help. =) It's good though. I want Diva to be used to a lot of people. I trust that she'll have a fun weekend. I'll post more on puppy parenting, life, grief, and general deep thoughts later. For now, I'll leave you all with a few pictures of the cutest little Diva ever, and her very pleased new mommy.
Diva is PERFECT! She's tiny, feisty, sweet, sassy, and all together lovable. She's already learning to use the litter box. I'm so proud! She also learned right away that she has to work with me if I'm going to pick her up. She actually climbs into my arms. Like me, she mostly likes to find the warmest place possible. She likes to nap in my arms. I'm so happy, I may BURST!
This morning I left for the SoulFeast retreat with Willow Creek. My friends Mike & Becca are babysitting till Sunday afternoon. It was painful leaving her this morning. Her little whimpers and moaning didn't help. =) It's good though. I want Diva to be used to a lot of people. I trust that she'll have a fun weekend. I'll post more on puppy parenting, life, grief, and general deep thoughts later. For now, I'll leave you all with a few pictures of the cutest little Diva ever, and her very pleased new mommy.
Saturday, September 24, 2005
Thank God!
I'm pleased to say that my family in Texas is safe and sound. I can't thank God enough for protecting them.
Today I worked 8 hours of overtime here in Chicago. Tomorrow, I pick up Diva at the airport. I can't wait to hold her. I took next week off so that we can bond and get to know each other. Friday, the 30th I'm going on a weekend retreat with the women of Willow Creek. I booked my place in the retreat way before I knew about Diva. I can't pass up this opportunity to refresh my spirit. So, Diva will spend the weekend with her Auntie Becca and Uncle Mike. What great friends I have! I trust them to take excellent care of my baby...
I'm looking forward to a week of being "unplugged". There's so much rushing in my life, it's nice to stop and breathe once in a while. I will definitely be posting pics of Diva soon, but not this week. This week is just for us. I hope you all have a wonderful week yourselves. I'll catch up with you all soon!
God Bless,
Mandy
Today I worked 8 hours of overtime here in Chicago. Tomorrow, I pick up Diva at the airport. I can't wait to hold her. I took next week off so that we can bond and get to know each other. Friday, the 30th I'm going on a weekend retreat with the women of Willow Creek. I booked my place in the retreat way before I knew about Diva. I can't pass up this opportunity to refresh my spirit. So, Diva will spend the weekend with her Auntie Becca and Uncle Mike. What great friends I have! I trust them to take excellent care of my baby...
I'm looking forward to a week of being "unplugged". There's so much rushing in my life, it's nice to stop and breathe once in a while. I will definitely be posting pics of Diva soon, but not this week. This week is just for us. I hope you all have a wonderful week yourselves. I'll catch up with you all soon!
God Bless,
Mandy
Friday, September 23, 2005
Forces of Nature...
Today I'm praying for the safety of my family in Texas. I'm also praying for the well being of a few million people I've never met.
God,
You are the creator of this world, and everything in it. Please protect those in crisis. I am depending on you to show up BIG. I've read the story of your ability to calm the seas. I ask that you do that again. Speak "Be still" once more. And if you do not, I will still love you tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. Lord, I'm not sure this family can stand one more trial. But as in all things, I submit to you. Protect Greg, Cheryl, Ashley, and Brooke. Bring them safely through the storm. If it's not too much trouble, can you protect the rest of the Texans as well?
AMEN
God,
You are the creator of this world, and everything in it. Please protect those in crisis. I am depending on you to show up BIG. I've read the story of your ability to calm the seas. I ask that you do that again. Speak "Be still" once more. And if you do not, I will still love you tomorrow, and the next day, and the next. Lord, I'm not sure this family can stand one more trial. But as in all things, I submit to you. Protect Greg, Cheryl, Ashley, and Brooke. Bring them safely through the storm. If it's not too much trouble, can you protect the rest of the Texans as well?
AMEN
Wednesday, September 21, 2005
OKAY...
I'm OK. I'm OK. I'm OK. I'm fine. Things are fine. We're doing fine. Good. Good. Good. Things are good.....
I'm tired. I'm tired of blanket responses and generic replies. Yes, some days I AM okay. But what about when I'm not? It seems like there is so much pain around me, that there is no room for one more hurting girl. It's very isolating. With the exception of a few select people, I have not had a real conversation with my family members in months. It's hard enough going through life without a mom, but now it feels like my "Support Beams" have slid away too. At 25, am I supposed to no longer need that kind of support? I'm not sure I can make it alone. To be honest, I don't want to...
So many wonderful things are happening around me. I bring Diva home Sunday, I'm almost done with the flooring project in my house, my sister is trying to make me an auntie, I'm throwing a party next month, and I'm almost done with my schooling. In some ways, I'm so blessed I could burst! Yet I still carry a sad weight in my chest. Laurie, MY LAURIE, the last person I feared losing, has deliberately chosen to miss out on life. Am I evil for being angry still? By comparison, MY life SUCKED next to hers. She was beautiful, talented, capable of doing ANYTHING! What kind of message is that to the rest of us? I for one, choose to keep moving forward. I'll take the good, and the bad, and the sorrow, and the joy. I never want to hurt anyone as badly as she's hurt me. Maybe part of it is the not saying of the thing....
To everyone I know:
I love you. I love what God is doing with your life right now.
Please choose to live. The world would have a gaping hole if you were gone.
I may forget to tell you, but you're needed. I NEED you!
It's important that you stay. We can do this journey together.
Don't lose hope.
But whatever, I'm done babbling. I'm ok. Everything is fine.....
I'm tired. I'm tired of blanket responses and generic replies. Yes, some days I AM okay. But what about when I'm not? It seems like there is so much pain around me, that there is no room for one more hurting girl. It's very isolating. With the exception of a few select people, I have not had a real conversation with my family members in months. It's hard enough going through life without a mom, but now it feels like my "Support Beams" have slid away too. At 25, am I supposed to no longer need that kind of support? I'm not sure I can make it alone. To be honest, I don't want to...
So many wonderful things are happening around me. I bring Diva home Sunday, I'm almost done with the flooring project in my house, my sister is trying to make me an auntie, I'm throwing a party next month, and I'm almost done with my schooling. In some ways, I'm so blessed I could burst! Yet I still carry a sad weight in my chest. Laurie, MY LAURIE, the last person I feared losing, has deliberately chosen to miss out on life. Am I evil for being angry still? By comparison, MY life SUCKED next to hers. She was beautiful, talented, capable of doing ANYTHING! What kind of message is that to the rest of us? I for one, choose to keep moving forward. I'll take the good, and the bad, and the sorrow, and the joy. I never want to hurt anyone as badly as she's hurt me. Maybe part of it is the not saying of the thing....
To everyone I know:
I love you. I love what God is doing with your life right now.
Please choose to live. The world would have a gaping hole if you were gone.
I may forget to tell you, but you're needed. I NEED you!
It's important that you stay. We can do this journey together.
Don't lose hope.
But whatever, I'm done babbling. I'm ok. Everything is fine.....
Friday, September 16, 2005
Adventures in Babysitting Part II
Tonight I have the privilege of spending the evening with four of my favorite people. Heidi, Denver, Maya, and Isaiah are all spending the night in my house. For such a small condo, I really know how to squeeze them in! I love nights like these. I love hanging out with these kids and learning who they are becoming. I'm blessed to be trusted with these cuties. That's the thing about Katie. She's the one person to date, that has always trusted me with her babies. One of my most treasured memories, is the day I held her daughter in my arms. She was about 40 hours old. I know several people who wouldn't let a fairy princess hold their 10 month old. But not Katie. She trusted me from the start. I'm humbled by that trust. I've never really babysat before these guys. I hope I don't mess up. It is my hope that as these children grow, staying in Mandyland becomes a treasured time. I hope I can be to them, what Aunt Joey was to us as kids. =) The one who didn't have kids, so instead made us all feel like we belonged to her.=)
Saturday, September 10, 2005
Well, I Did It! I'm a Puppy Mom!
Diva Starbucks Peszat
It's official. I'm a puppy mom now. Meet Diva.Born July 26, 2005. She's a teacup Min Pin. Possibly the cutest Ever! I bought her yesterday and she will come home Sunday September 25. She is from South Carolina. She should be about 3 lbs when she grows up. I just had to have her!
Smile everyone!
=)
Added note:
Rosie (my guinea pig) is still alive. However, she is in poor health and very old. Her vet thinks I should put her to rest... These things were in motion before Diva entered the picture.
Thursday, September 08, 2005
Wednesday Night...
I was sitting in New Com Wednesday, and God was working on my heart. Our pastor spoke about "losing our first love". How we can sing, and serve, and teach, in the name of Jesus, and totally bypass our personal relationship with Him. I thought of how I've drifted from time to time. My own drifts always make me think of Laurie now. And then he said something that stuck in my chest like a stone. "Even when we feel distant from God, He's never gone from us". Our relationship may feel sometimes like it's on the rocks, but the truth is, God is never leaving, and never changing. He's as madly in love with me today, as He was before time began. How intense is that!?!?
So, as I'm sitting there, rolling the impact of that truth around in my head, they start to sing "Let My Words Be Few". I instantly think of Laur, and that email from Mexico... I cry. I can't help it. I miss her. I miss the days when her intensity for God was palpable. I cry some more...
And if that wasn't enough to flush my system of grief....
The very next song we sang was "I Love You Lord". This was my Mom's favorite song of all time. I cried buckets at this point! It was good though. I think I needed it. Sometimes I think the only way to survive losses like I've experienced, is to let it hit you right between the eyes. Shying away from it, only makes it hurt longer. Sometimes weeping, cursing, or just plain crumbling, is the only way to cope.
Here is a brief excerpt from Laurie's "Let My Words Be Few" email to family and friends:
"Okay...One quick story: Yesterday while I was in the shower I had the song "Let My Words Be Few" stuck in my head. The words go like this, "You are God in heaven, and here am I on earth, so I'll by words be few. Jesus, I am so in love with You. The simplest of all love songs, I want to bring to You, so I'll let my words be few. Jesus, I am so in love with You. And I'll stand in awe of You." Later when I was in my bedroom, I was thinking of the ways that I need to stand more in awe of God. I thought of things like more prayer, more time in worship, more solitude, or more time in His Word. At that moment, I felt God saying, "Laurie,why don't you go and read your Bible right now? You're not busy...Just do it now." Trying my best to be obedient.I sat down on my bed and decided to randomly open my Bible. I opened it to the book of Ecclesiastes (a book I'm not very familiar with). The first thing my eyes read was this: STAND IN AWE OF GOD. (SMILE) Can you believe it? Our God was clearly communicating to me that in my life I truly need to stand in awe of His mighty works. Ecclesiastes 5:1-7 talks about living in awe of God instead of living meaningless lives. Wow! It's moments like that where any doubt I have of God is quickly washed away."- 2/16/2003
So, as I'm sitting there, rolling the impact of that truth around in my head, they start to sing "Let My Words Be Few". I instantly think of Laur, and that email from Mexico... I cry. I can't help it. I miss her. I miss the days when her intensity for God was palpable. I cry some more...
And if that wasn't enough to flush my system of grief....
The very next song we sang was "I Love You Lord". This was my Mom's favorite song of all time. I cried buckets at this point! It was good though. I think I needed it. Sometimes I think the only way to survive losses like I've experienced, is to let it hit you right between the eyes. Shying away from it, only makes it hurt longer. Sometimes weeping, cursing, or just plain crumbling, is the only way to cope.
Here is a brief excerpt from Laurie's "Let My Words Be Few" email to family and friends:
"Okay...One quick story: Yesterday while I was in the shower I had the song "Let My Words Be Few" stuck in my head. The words go like this, "You are God in heaven, and here am I on earth, so I'll by words be few. Jesus, I am so in love with You. The simplest of all love songs, I want to bring to You, so I'll let my words be few. Jesus, I am so in love with You. And I'll stand in awe of You." Later when I was in my bedroom, I was thinking of the ways that I need to stand more in awe of God. I thought of things like more prayer, more time in worship, more solitude, or more time in His Word. At that moment, I felt God saying, "Laurie,why don't you go and read your Bible right now? You're not busy...Just do it now." Trying my best to be obedient.I sat down on my bed and decided to randomly open my Bible. I opened it to the book of Ecclesiastes (a book I'm not very familiar with). The first thing my eyes read was this: STAND IN AWE OF GOD. (SMILE) Can you believe it? Our God was clearly communicating to me that in my life I truly need to stand in awe of His mighty works. Ecclesiastes 5:1-7 talks about living in awe of God instead of living meaningless lives. Wow! It's moments like that where any doubt I have of God is quickly washed away."- 2/16/2003
Wednesday, September 07, 2005
Katie...
My Cousin.
My Sister.
My Rock.
My Friend.
My Sounding Board.
My Late Night Gigglefest.
My Fellow Club Girl.
My Game Board Goddess.
My Shoulder To Cry On.
My Safe Place.
My Drinking Buddy.
My Shopping Cohort.
My Tripoly Opponent.
My Judgment Free Zone.
My Dear Girl...
Katie,
I love you. I thank God you're in my life. We have shared more of life's big moments than some people ever will. Thank you for allowing me to get so close to your heart. You're beautiful when you let all your broken stuff spill out. If this life has been a trial by fire, you're coming out golden my friend! Happy Birthday.
Love,
Mand
My Sister.
My Rock.
My Friend.
My Sounding Board.
My Late Night Gigglefest.
My Fellow Club Girl.
My Game Board Goddess.
My Shoulder To Cry On.
My Safe Place.
My Drinking Buddy.
My Shopping Cohort.
My Tripoly Opponent.
My Judgment Free Zone.
My Dear Girl...
Katie,
I love you. I thank God you're in my life. We have shared more of life's big moments than some people ever will. Thank you for allowing me to get so close to your heart. You're beautiful when you let all your broken stuff spill out. If this life has been a trial by fire, you're coming out golden my friend! Happy Birthday.
Love,
Mand
Friday, September 02, 2005
Six Months...
I can't believe we're here already. Some days it feels like a distant memory. Yet there are moments when I close my eyes and the loss is so fresh. Will we ever be the same? No, I think not. Will we endure? I'm positive that we will. Over the past six months, I've seen such tremendous strength in the core of my family. I've also see beautiful vulnerability. The tragedy that has rocked us, has reaffirmed our character. We are survivors. We are rebuilding our hearts. We are a work in progress. We are still standing. I don't pretend to know why this has all happened. I'll never get my mind around Laurie's choice to leave. I wish I could make her take it back. For selfish reasons, I want her here with me. And then I think of the countless people who have told us that seeing the aftermath of Laurie's death has caused them to rethink taking there own lives. I believe that God makes good things come out of our bad choices. Did He want Laur to cut in line at the pearly gate? NO! Is He going to use it for the greater good? ABSOLUTELY! The pain of losing my beautiful cousin is more intense than I can express, but I take some comfort in knowing that lives are being preserved because of all this. Because of the brave openness of my family in sharing their grief, other families are being spared. That doesn't heal the wound completely, but for me, it helps.
Today I pray for all those struggling with depression, and suicidal thoughts.... Don't give in to that voice. There are people who need you here and now. God loves you, and He has a plan for your life. I pray you allow yourself to continue on your journey. If you are in a place where things are getting too big, I pray you get help today! Call someone, be honest about your thoughts. Allow the people around you to share your burdens. It is not God's plan that you should be isolated, or alone. I pray you find a glimmer of hope today.
Six months down and a lifetime to go. I wonder what the next months and years will bring...
Today I pray for all those struggling with depression, and suicidal thoughts.... Don't give in to that voice. There are people who need you here and now. God loves you, and He has a plan for your life. I pray you allow yourself to continue on your journey. If you are in a place where things are getting too big, I pray you get help today! Call someone, be honest about your thoughts. Allow the people around you to share your burdens. It is not God's plan that you should be isolated, or alone. I pray you find a glimmer of hope today.
Six months down and a lifetime to go. I wonder what the next months and years will bring...
Thursday, September 01, 2005
What Really Matters?
As I watch on CNN as New Orleans becomes a mass of washed away possessions, buildings, lives, I hear stories of people searching for lost belongings. It forces me to consider my own life. What would I scramble for if my world was about to wash away? What possessions would I try to save? Do I own anything that I could not live without? I honestly don't think so. I have tons of "stuff" but does any of it matter? There are things that I love, that would be heartbreaking to lose. Pictures of my family, letters from my Mom, paintings, autographed books, blankets made by Grandma... All of it is important, but none of it matters in the big picture. I think the last eight years have taught me not to hold on too tight. Everything on this earth (including our loved ones) is bound to pass away. I think I've reached a numb place where lose simply doesn't shock me anymore. I grieve for those who are just now learning this truth. It's such a painful life lesson. My prayers go up this week for the survivors of Katrina's wrath. God, grant them peace in the middle of this devastation.
So, the question remains. What would you take with you? What really matters to you?
So, the question remains. What would you take with you? What really matters to you?
Wednesday, August 31, 2005
Things That Make Me Go AHHHHHHHHHHH!
1. Ignorance, in all it's forms.
2. People who claim not to believe in God, but are still quick to blame Him for all the negative stuff of life.
3. People who ask about Laurie out of morbid curiosity, instead of concern for my family.
4. Dishonesty. How hard is it to let your yes be yes, and your no be no?
5. Bullies.
6. Cheaters.
7. Criminals.
8. Christians who would rather denounce the title, than try to fix what's broken.
9. People who complain about our world without trying to fix it.
10. People who pity me.
11. Intolerance.
12. Cruelty.
13. Freedom of speech without being able to say the name of Jesus.
14. Political Correctness.
15. Reality TV.
16. The world's lack of sugar free Twinkies.
17. Social Security telling me I'm no longer disabled and I owe $12,000.00.
18. Discrimination.
19. Gas Prices!
20. Long drawn out debates over, judgment, discernment, and proper parenting.
These are the things that currently make me want to scream. Now that I've written them down, perhaps I'll breathe easier. Have a great day everyone!
Mandy
2. People who claim not to believe in God, but are still quick to blame Him for all the negative stuff of life.
3. People who ask about Laurie out of morbid curiosity, instead of concern for my family.
4. Dishonesty. How hard is it to let your yes be yes, and your no be no?
5. Bullies.
6. Cheaters.
7. Criminals.
8. Christians who would rather denounce the title, than try to fix what's broken.
9. People who complain about our world without trying to fix it.
10. People who pity me.
11. Intolerance.
12. Cruelty.
13. Freedom of speech without being able to say the name of Jesus.
14. Political Correctness.
15. Reality TV.
16. The world's lack of sugar free Twinkies.
17. Social Security telling me I'm no longer disabled and I owe $12,000.00.
18. Discrimination.
19. Gas Prices!
20. Long drawn out debates over, judgment, discernment, and proper parenting.
These are the things that currently make me want to scream. Now that I've written them down, perhaps I'll breathe easier. Have a great day everyone!
Mandy
Monday, August 29, 2005
One Lucky Girl!
It's official. I have been blessed with the GREATEST FAMILY EVER! Yesterday, my dream team of worker bees installed my new floor. It's done. In five hours my entire home was given new life. Thank you to Dad, Snow, Jim, Heidi, Steph, Phil, Marie, and Lil Jen. You have no idea how thankful I am that you are in my life. The flooring is excellent! I can't wait to get the trim up and take pictures. I wish I could have helped more, but my contribution of pizza and beer will have to do. =)
Wednesday, August 24, 2005
Odds and Ends...
My life is moving at an insane pace. August has slipped past me in a blink. I wish my body could keep up. I think my insides are rebelling against me. I have a kidney infection, and an 8 day headache. I have to visit the doctor and have some tests run. All part of the fun of Princess life I suppose. I'll be ok though. I know so many people who are going through worse.
Two weeks ago I bought laminate flooring for my house. I'm so excited to have it installed! For those of you who have seen my current carpeting, you can imagine my joy. I'll have to take before and after photos for the rest of you.
My new assistant Jackie is fantastic! Except Thursday she broke her ankle and now Moogi (her sister) is filling in. Moogi and I get along great though, and with the exception of a few language barriers, things have gone smoothly. I can't thank God enough for sending me an assistant with a built in backup person!
Last weekend I got to spend time with some of my favorite people. It felt good to be among friends. I also got a compliment on Saturday that may have my head inflated for the next month or so. A very attractive man told me that my smile is "stunning" and that I'm "very beautiful". Talk about good for my ego! I never think of myself as attractive, so it's nice when I'm caught by surprise like that...
This week I began planning my sister's 30th Birthday party. I'm positive I will have more to say on the subject as time draws nearer... For now, I've rented a banquet hall, and made up a guest list. Thank God it's not a surprise party! That means I can let Heidi pick her own decorations. She loves stuff like that... (see her blog about Hobby Lobby). Now, I need to pick out a costume... hmmm... Too many choices. Any suggestions?
Saturday I'm getting together with the Club Girls. I can't wait! It's always a joy when our little band of Ya Ya's gather. It should be a blast!
That's what's new in MandyLand... I hope all is well in your world.
God Bless,
Mandy
Two weeks ago I bought laminate flooring for my house. I'm so excited to have it installed! For those of you who have seen my current carpeting, you can imagine my joy. I'll have to take before and after photos for the rest of you.
My new assistant Jackie is fantastic! Except Thursday she broke her ankle and now Moogi (her sister) is filling in. Moogi and I get along great though, and with the exception of a few language barriers, things have gone smoothly. I can't thank God enough for sending me an assistant with a built in backup person!
Last weekend I got to spend time with some of my favorite people. It felt good to be among friends. I also got a compliment on Saturday that may have my head inflated for the next month or so. A very attractive man told me that my smile is "stunning" and that I'm "very beautiful". Talk about good for my ego! I never think of myself as attractive, so it's nice when I'm caught by surprise like that...
This week I began planning my sister's 30th Birthday party. I'm positive I will have more to say on the subject as time draws nearer... For now, I've rented a banquet hall, and made up a guest list. Thank God it's not a surprise party! That means I can let Heidi pick her own decorations. She loves stuff like that... (see her blog about Hobby Lobby). Now, I need to pick out a costume... hmmm... Too many choices. Any suggestions?
Saturday I'm getting together with the Club Girls. I can't wait! It's always a joy when our little band of Ya Ya's gather. It should be a blast!
That's what's new in MandyLand... I hope all is well in your world.
God Bless,
Mandy
Thursday, August 18, 2005
I Have a Dream...
Last night at church I had a personal break through, or maybe a breakdown, but whatever. The point is that God clearly showed me my purpose for existing last night. At 25, I've got it. And I'm going to change the world!
Our new pastor was speaking about his disabled son last night. I'm sure that the rest of our congregation found it 100% moving and inspirational. In all honesty, I was more like 10% moved, and 90% ill. For the record, before I go on, I really admire our new pastor, and his son is a true inspiration! There were just a few things said that made my skin crawl. It's my blog, I can be honest.
To start things off, he used the term HANDICAP numerous times. I can make exception's for folks who are new to "The Princess Community", but when a man who has lived with a disabled person for 17 years uses that vile term, my hackles go up. For those whom are not in the know, the term originated back in the days when the only job a disabled person could aspire to was to sit on a street corner and HAND OUT THEIR CAP for money. I understand that when people use this term today, they are not deliberately calling someone a beggar, but there it is. The fact that the word still graces street signs, and parking spaces amazes me.
However, that was a mild offense compared to what followed. As the pastor told the story of his son's birth, my heart genuinely went out to him. He was speaking honestly about the fears and struggles he experienced in the early part of his little boy's life. I commend him for his honesty. I can well imagine his fear of the unknown. But then he said that he had to ask himself if he could love his child... Something sick and ugly twisted inside of me. And then it broke free!
I do not blame anyone for feeling these things. We live in a world that praises a myth called perfection. I have news for the world. Every man, and woman on the planet was born flawed. And even the healthiest person in the world is still damaged. In fact, the pastor did eventually come around to this point. In this world, beautiful rising stars, snap and go over the edge (literally). Superman becomes a quadriplegic. This is the truth about the world we live in.
So what's my dream? How do I fit in the "Big Picture"? God is using me. He has equipped me to speak up in the face of this disillusion. I'm here to shine a light on reality. People are broken, but God does His best work with broken! I want to cast a vision for parents with disabled kids ( a support through the journey to the unknown). I want to motivate people to use their gifts. I want to be a part of changing how the world perceives limitations. I want to teach other people to except their limitations, and still strive for greatness! My life is a living example of the Serenity Prayer... But then, shouldn't we all live this out?
Lord,
HELP ME! To accept the things I can not change.
Grant me COURAGE! To change the things I can...
Give me WISDOM! To know the difference.
AMEN
Our new pastor was speaking about his disabled son last night. I'm sure that the rest of our congregation found it 100% moving and inspirational. In all honesty, I was more like 10% moved, and 90% ill. For the record, before I go on, I really admire our new pastor, and his son is a true inspiration! There were just a few things said that made my skin crawl. It's my blog, I can be honest.
To start things off, he used the term HANDICAP numerous times. I can make exception's for folks who are new to "The Princess Community", but when a man who has lived with a disabled person for 17 years uses that vile term, my hackles go up. For those whom are not in the know, the term originated back in the days when the only job a disabled person could aspire to was to sit on a street corner and HAND OUT THEIR CAP for money. I understand that when people use this term today, they are not deliberately calling someone a beggar, but there it is. The fact that the word still graces street signs, and parking spaces amazes me.
However, that was a mild offense compared to what followed. As the pastor told the story of his son's birth, my heart genuinely went out to him. He was speaking honestly about the fears and struggles he experienced in the early part of his little boy's life. I commend him for his honesty. I can well imagine his fear of the unknown. But then he said that he had to ask himself if he could love his child... Something sick and ugly twisted inside of me. And then it broke free!
I do not blame anyone for feeling these things. We live in a world that praises a myth called perfection. I have news for the world. Every man, and woman on the planet was born flawed. And even the healthiest person in the world is still damaged. In fact, the pastor did eventually come around to this point. In this world, beautiful rising stars, snap and go over the edge (literally). Superman becomes a quadriplegic. This is the truth about the world we live in.
So what's my dream? How do I fit in the "Big Picture"? God is using me. He has equipped me to speak up in the face of this disillusion. I'm here to shine a light on reality. People are broken, but God does His best work with broken! I want to cast a vision for parents with disabled kids ( a support through the journey to the unknown). I want to motivate people to use their gifts. I want to be a part of changing how the world perceives limitations. I want to teach other people to except their limitations, and still strive for greatness! My life is a living example of the Serenity Prayer... But then, shouldn't we all live this out?
Lord,
HELP ME! To accept the things I can not change.
Grant me COURAGE! To change the things I can...
Give me WISDOM! To know the difference.
AMEN
Tuesday, August 16, 2005
Walking Wounded
It's amazing what we can survive. People hear my story and sometimes say "Oh, I could NEVER handle that!"The amazing thing though, is how presumptuous that kind of statement is. Who can safely say that they won't be in the same place one day?
When my Mom died, I thought the world would stop spinning. The bottom fell out in my life. And yet, here I am. Eight years later, I'm still standing. Ok... Maybe not STANDING, but you get my point. I never thought I'd ever go through anything worse than my Mother's death. In some ways, I was right. I've yet to experience anything as horrible as seeing that with my own eyes... I don't want to go there.
Laurie's death was still much more traumatic in it's own way. Suicide injures people far more than any other kind of death. Maybe because it's their choice to leave. Maybe it's the fact that this pain is forced on you unnessarily. I haven't sorted it all out yet. I may never have it straight. I just know that this wound festers even as it heals. My family is a strong surviving group. We are "RESILIENT" as one friend puts it... But we are still broken, and we continue to move forward as walking wounded survivors.
When my Mom died, I thought the world would stop spinning. The bottom fell out in my life. And yet, here I am. Eight years later, I'm still standing. Ok... Maybe not STANDING, but you get my point. I never thought I'd ever go through anything worse than my Mother's death. In some ways, I was right. I've yet to experience anything as horrible as seeing that with my own eyes... I don't want to go there.
Laurie's death was still much more traumatic in it's own way. Suicide injures people far more than any other kind of death. Maybe because it's their choice to leave. Maybe it's the fact that this pain is forced on you unnessarily. I haven't sorted it all out yet. I may never have it straight. I just know that this wound festers even as it heals. My family is a strong surviving group. We are "RESILIENT" as one friend puts it... But we are still broken, and we continue to move forward as walking wounded survivors.
Friday, August 12, 2005
The Color 9...
Smell the Color 9
Chris Rice
I would take no for an answer
Just to know I heard You speak
And I'm wonderin' why I've never
Seen the signs they claim to see
Are the special revelations
Meant for everbody but me?
Maybe I don't truly know You
Or maybe I just simply believe'
Cause I can sniff, I can see, I can count up pretty high
But these faculties aren't getting me any close to the sky
But my heart of faith keeps poundin' So I know I'm doin' fine
But sometimes finding You
Is just like trying to
Smell the color nine
Now I've never 'felt the presence'
But I know You're always near
And I've never 'heard the calling'
But somehow You've lead me right here
So I'm not looking for burning bushes
Or some divine graffiti to appear
I'm just begging You for some wisdom
And believing You're putting some here
'Cause I can sniff, I can see, I can count up pretty high
But these faculties aren't getting me any close to the sky
But my heart of faith keeps poundin' So I know I'm doin' fine
But sometimes finding You
Is just like trying to
Smell the color nine
Smell the color nine?
But nine's not a color
And even if it were you can't smell a color
That's my point exactly
What is it about Chris Rice? His lyrics speak for my heart. Can anyone else relate to this one?
Chris Rice
I would take no for an answer
Just to know I heard You speak
And I'm wonderin' why I've never
Seen the signs they claim to see
Are the special revelations
Meant for everbody but me?
Maybe I don't truly know You
Or maybe I just simply believe'
Cause I can sniff, I can see, I can count up pretty high
But these faculties aren't getting me any close to the sky
But my heart of faith keeps poundin' So I know I'm doin' fine
But sometimes finding You
Is just like trying to
Smell the color nine
Now I've never 'felt the presence'
But I know You're always near
And I've never 'heard the calling'
But somehow You've lead me right here
So I'm not looking for burning bushes
Or some divine graffiti to appear
I'm just begging You for some wisdom
And believing You're putting some here
'Cause I can sniff, I can see, I can count up pretty high
But these faculties aren't getting me any close to the sky
But my heart of faith keeps poundin' So I know I'm doin' fine
But sometimes finding You
Is just like trying to
Smell the color nine
Smell the color nine?
But nine's not a color
And even if it were you can't smell a color
That's my point exactly
What is it about Chris Rice? His lyrics speak for my heart. Can anyone else relate to this one?
Thursday, August 11, 2005
LGYC
Yesterday I spent the day up at teen camp. I love being up there with family, friends, and 200 young people yearning to know Jesus. I love seeing the campers mixed in with camp staff family members. Toddlers and teens, and everything in between. What a neat place to see God at work...
I have to be honest though, Laurie was haunting me there. Memories of our childhood years up at camp crashed in around me. Images flashed before me as I strolled the campus. Laurie, riding in my lap at age 5. Laurie, playing Frisbee on the grounds. Laurie, worshiping with total abandon in chapel. Ari and I both said we could picture her dancing in the isles last night.
I met some amazing young people Wednesday. Even as I enjoyed their company, there was a part of me praying that they would hold on to what they learned up here. I prayed that they would carry their faith home with them this year. That they would grow deeper in love with God as they mature. I prayed too, that they would allow themselves the freedom to question, and explore the depths of their faith. My mother used to say "Dig deep. Ask the tough questions. If you hit absolute rock bottom, you'll find Jesus." I pray for the courage of all Christians to dive deep, and bravely question their foundation. We do not serve a "Wizard of Oz" God! We will never pull back the curtain and be disillusioned by what we find. So my 10 minutes of prayer today goes up for bravery and boldness in our continuing journey.
I have to be honest though, Laurie was haunting me there. Memories of our childhood years up at camp crashed in around me. Images flashed before me as I strolled the campus. Laurie, riding in my lap at age 5. Laurie, playing Frisbee on the grounds. Laurie, worshiping with total abandon in chapel. Ari and I both said we could picture her dancing in the isles last night.
I met some amazing young people Wednesday. Even as I enjoyed their company, there was a part of me praying that they would hold on to what they learned up here. I prayed that they would carry their faith home with them this year. That they would grow deeper in love with God as they mature. I prayed too, that they would allow themselves the freedom to question, and explore the depths of their faith. My mother used to say "Dig deep. Ask the tough questions. If you hit absolute rock bottom, you'll find Jesus." I pray for the courage of all Christians to dive deep, and bravely question their foundation. We do not serve a "Wizard of Oz" God! We will never pull back the curtain and be disillusioned by what we find. So my 10 minutes of prayer today goes up for bravery and boldness in our continuing journey.
Tuesday, August 09, 2005
Steph
Has there ever been a better friend than Stephanie Pelka? I've known her since before I can remember, and I'm convinced that God put her in my life with great purpose. She's been my sister, and friend for 23 years. No one on earth makes me laugh harder! No one on earth makes me feel safer when I cry... In life, it's good to have accountability partners. These are the people who love you through your bad choices and lovingly point you back in the right direction. Steph has a capacity for mercy that blows my mind. She can hear the ugliest truths about me and still hug me. She can rant and rage at Laurie for leaving and still refer to her as "our sweet girl". Steph is that one person that you know is unconditional in the way she loves. She exemplifies the love of God. Knowing her has improved my journey...
I'm blessed with extraordinary friends and family. Sometimes I just feel the need to shout their praises!
I'm blessed with extraordinary friends and family. Sometimes I just feel the need to shout their praises!
Friday, August 05, 2005
Velvet Elvis...
I started a new book today by Rob Bell. It blows my mind! Rob Bell is the pastor of Mars Hill Church in Michigan (famous for bringing a live goat on stage with him at Willow Creek). He's an "out-of-the box" thinker and a truly brilliant theologian. If you've never had the privilege of hearing him speak, I highly recommend reading his book. It's all the intellect without any of his usual jittery ADD nature. I love this book! I love seeing someone fired up about the freedom that faith offers. Go get this book. You won't regret it!
Thursday, August 04, 2005
Waiting to Exhale...
I feel like we're all under observation. Kind of like a house arrest or parole of sorts. Thanks to Laurie, we all watch each other more closely. Don't get me wrong. In some ways it's a good thing. We say "I love you" more. We check in with one another more frequently. We make more time fore each other. That part is good. Very good. Yet there is a new fear among us. Now that we have been made painfully aware of how far a loved one can slip, we are easily shaken. It never used to bother me if someone didn't call me right back. "Leave a message at the beep and I'll get back to you as soon as I can"... Ok, fine. Except now I know what it feels like when you never get that call. I panic if I start thinking too long on it. The feeling of not knowing where my loved ones are is highly upsetting. It takes me back to that day. The day I called her voicemail over and over... I had a similar experience twice in recent days and it literally left me drained. I miss the days when I didn't know the worst case scenario. I wish I could go back to a time when if someone didn't call me back, it meant their batteries were low. I also wish we all still had the freedom to disappear for a while. We can't just fade out anymore. Even if we wanted to, there's always the knowledge of how worried someone else will be if I don't connect. It was selfish what Laurie did. She took away our right to minor breakdowns. Thanks to her, it's all or nothing. I pray we all hold up under this new strain...
Tuesday, August 02, 2005
Praise God for His Faithfulness!
Friends,
Thank you all for your prayer's and support. God is good to supply all my needs. I have hired a new assistant. She lives in Woodstock (about 15 minutes away). She has experience as a physical assistant, a seamstress, a cook, and a housekeeper. She also has an experienced sister who is available to fill in if need arises. This all comes as a tremendous blessing right now. For those of you who know me at all, you know that Satan targets me hardest during times when my physical needs are not being met. I have prayed about this, and I really thing God is getting ready to bless my socks off! If, I'm wrong, I can always place my add again... =)
I just thought I'd catch everyone up on what's happening on my home front. God Bless and I hope you're having a great day!
Mandy
Thank you all for your prayer's and support. God is good to supply all my needs. I have hired a new assistant. She lives in Woodstock (about 15 minutes away). She has experience as a physical assistant, a seamstress, a cook, and a housekeeper. She also has an experienced sister who is available to fill in if need arises. This all comes as a tremendous blessing right now. For those of you who know me at all, you know that Satan targets me hardest during times when my physical needs are not being met. I have prayed about this, and I really thing God is getting ready to bless my socks off! If, I'm wrong, I can always place my add again... =)
I just thought I'd catch everyone up on what's happening on my home front. God Bless and I hope you're having a great day!
Mandy
Monday, August 01, 2005
An Update.
I'm now seriously looking for a new assistant. I had to fire my assistant Friday. I hate to be the bad guy, but it was necessary. No matter how much I may like someone, I can't keep working with them if they are going to be unreliable. I'm interviewing someone tonight. Please pray for me.
On a positive note: I had the privilege of meeting Debbi Dunlap yesterday. What an amazing lady! I so enjoyed getting to know her.
I also have to say a HUGE thank you to Heidi, and Marie for all their support lately. Thanks to these wonderful people, I've been well cared for in times of great distress. Marie, I can't thank you enough for saving my butt over the last several days! I love you bunches, and I'd be lost without you.
Mandy
On a positive note: I had the privilege of meeting Debbi Dunlap yesterday. What an amazing lady! I so enjoyed getting to know her.
I also have to say a HUGE thank you to Heidi, and Marie for all their support lately. Thanks to these wonderful people, I've been well cared for in times of great distress. Marie, I can't thank you enough for saving my butt over the last several days! I love you bunches, and I'd be lost without you.
Mandy
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