I have given a lot of thought to how this week should feel. All year we've silently counted down to the one year mark. So much has happened in so few days. 365. That's all it takes to travel from there to here.
Today I'm sitting in front of my new computer typing out my thoughts as my 7 month old puppy hops around at my feet. She makes me so happy, I can't imagine not having her with me. Tomorrow, I return to my doctor's office. With any luck, he'll release me back to work. It will be good I think.
Wednesday, I've been asked to return to Gateway College as a guest speaker. I love these times and always look forward to being used for these purposes.
And then there is Thursday.....
I can't believe we're here. I can't believe how readily my heart opens up to pour out the old sting. The pain of losing my beautiful Laurie feels hot, and fresh this week. The heaviness of it cuts off air in my lungs. I've decided to allow it to wound me just this once. I'll take all the pain. I'll feel it full force and then let it slip free. I need the freedom that Laurie herself has. I need the freedom to move on.
2 comments:
Miss Manders -
I've been thinking about you a lot these days. I can imagine the burden, but of course I don't know the full force...and hope I never will...I'm sure it's something nobody can really empathize or sympathize unless they've been there. I hope you'll call, text or email me whenever you need. I hope I can be the friend you need now. I hope you're getting the healing, both physical and emotional, you need.
Sending you all my hopes, prayers, and love...
becca
I love you. Lots. Forever.
Always,
Katie
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